My heart is broken. This is the worst year ever!

Nothing wakes you up more than hopping on Facebook to find out that your (adopted) Brother-in-law is dead. Lorie has been my family for ever. She has shared her brothers and sisters and parents with me for so long. I have been so lucky. But now I have to wonder how lucky that is when it causes so much pain.

This year has been awful for so many things.  In January I have a heat attack and finds out that practically every artery in my body is clogged. I am a walking death waiting to happen. I spend 3 months off work and dealing with issues I don't want to.

Not long after returning to work a Friend whom I have never met in person but who I have developed a good friendship with through work dies. My heart is bruised. 

My sweet friend Charlotte goes to have a simple gall bladder surgery only to have it turn into a nightmare from hell. She ends up going to a month of issues, almost dies but does pull through. 

Then as I am just getting back to dealing with life, my husband is forced to take a decrease in pay and a demotion. This of course happens right after my student loan payments goes up by $200.00 a month.

Then My beloved Aunt goes into the hospital and care centers and is miserable.

Then my (adopted) brother Brian dies an accidental death.  My heart is cracked almost beyond repair.

My Aunt dies not long after and my heart is crushed to almost nothing. But I am trying to repair it.

My niece is addicted to drugs and can't seem to shake it. I'm so sad and scared for her and just want to take her away to make her better. 

I just spent the weekend consoling a good friend over the death of her beloved dog. He lived 16 good years but it's still hard. I cried for her, for him, and for myself.

I find out that Charlotte has to be in the hospital because of the screwed up gall bladder surgery and now has an infection that is life threatening because of the screw up. 

And now Nate, Jo's husband dies.  My heart is completely broke. I don't know if I will be able to put it back together. I can only wish to get us the hell out of this year. Who next?  I'm terrified.