My Auntie Elaine passed away on Tuesday night, July 13, 2010. She struggled so much with her health that although we are sad, this is some what of a blessing. I know that she was there through my childhood, but when I was 10 she disappeared from my life for 13 years.
She found me again the evening of my father's viewing, haven spotted his obituary. I didn't recognize this woman and actually had to ask who she was. When she said I used to know her as Aunt Sue, it immediately brought back memories of a time when my mother was around and I wasn't sure exactly how I felt. But I gave her my number and said she could call me, and expected no further contact from either her or my cousin.
Soon I learned that she was as she liked to put it: "I'm like a bad penny. I just keep showing up." She was always calling even though I didn't answer, always leaving messages and when I did answer or call back, she was always concerned on how I was doing. After several months I finally let her into the privacy of my life and allowed her to be my acquaintance. Next thing I know she is at my house, talking to me and even getting me a job. We worked together at Marriott until the time of my being layed off. During that 5 year stretch, I gained my cousin who is like a brother, his wife who is my cousin, my big sister, and my friend. I got a little sister and two sweet if not obnoxious young cousin/nieces. And a couple years later I got a sweet little boy who is my nephew and two very sweet little grand cousin/nieces to call mine.
She gave advise, shared wisdom, and showed compassion. She gave it too me straight when I needed it and showed the strength it took to survive. For all the times I rolled my eyes when she called, or thought I would just get back to her later, I always knew she was there when I needed her. I hope I was there when she needed me.
She was my strength when I needed someone wiser to talk to, and she was my ride when I was car-less. She was my opportunity when I needed something to get done, and my sounding board when I was looking for objectivity.
She was my mom when I need mom stuff, and my aunt when I needed that. She helped me with the answers when I wasn't even sure of the questions, and never once did she make me feel unwelcome or unloved.
She loved everyone and was always such a friend. I was always warning her about her "strays", but she kept on helping everyone she met. If you needed an ear to talk to, a shoulder to cry on, she was there. And if you needed something else like a place to stay or help with a car, well she would do her best to help there too.
She never had a lot of money, but she had plenty of heart to share. She learned some hard lessons in life and was the first to impart her lesson so that you could avoid her mistakes.
I am going to miss talking to her and laughing and telling her all about me and my world. I realized that my goal was always to tell her something funny, just to make her laugh. Now I will have to set those stories here just so I know she can read them. I hate that suddenly she's not a phone call away. I hate that she will never call me "girl!" again, or that she won't tell me to calm down and remember that my husband loves me for all he's worth.
I get to go away with knowing how proud she is of me, and that she knew that I loved her. My life has been blessed the last 14 years knowing her again.
When the world is on your shoulder all you can do is stand strong. When a loved one has to leave us, all we can do is say: "goodbye, I love you and will see you later." and when the tears threaten to fall, all you can do is let them go and cry. There is no shame. There is only strength and love and understanding.
My God be with you until we meet again. May you know how many lives you touched and left better. You will be in my heart always. Please give my love to my Daddy and tell him I miss him so much, but that you took care of me. Give my love to Uncle Bill, to Lyle and even to my mother.
Miss you my Auntie Elaine. Lady Elaine "fairchild" has left the building.......
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